Today while I was taking a shower the shower curtain rod fell down. I was just washing my hair, minding my own business, and it decided to detach itself from the wall and throw itself on the floor. I just stood there, covered in shampoo, looking at it all twisted up with the shower curtain on the floor. Just looking at it.
After about five seconds of going "Did that actually just happen?" I thought maybe I should try and put it back up so water would stop going all over the bathroom floor. (Novel idea, eh?) So I picked it up and tried to stick it back up. It fell right back down. It's one of those rods with a spring in it so you just kind of wedge it up and it stays. Easy, right? Nothing doing.
As I stood there under the water with shampoo suds running all over the place, trying desperate to get the stupid curtain rod to stay I slipped and almost fell on my face. Turns out shampoo is slippery. And as I stood there holding the rod and bracing myself on the flimsy soap rack thingy to keep from falling down and killing myself, I began to contemplate the ridiculous nature of my situation. All of the sudden it just seemed enormously funny. And I started laughing.
If you have ever tried to put a shower curtain while covered in slippery shampoo suds and water, trying not to fall on your head, and while laughing hysterically, you will know that it is pretty much impossible. (Also, I am really, really sorry you ever had to go through that.) I was beginning to be afraid that I was going to hurt myself. So I did the only sensible thing. I stopped laughing and called my brother.
"Rainor!" Pause. "Rainor!" Nothing. "Rainor! Get your butt in here!" I can now hear him talking to my Mom in an attempt to ignore me. "Help!" I hear some deliberations as to whether or not help should be sent. Also I begin to realize how silly it is that I have to ask for help and start laughing again. "Help me!" This last bit was yelled as I was laughing and for whatever reason He came right away this time.
I won't write here what he actually said when he saw me there holding the curtain rod up in front of me, covered in suds, laughing and saying "Helpppp meeee!" ala "The Fly". But it was a profanity of amazement. The kind of amazement that is equaled by, say, the news that your sister has managed to super glue all ten of her fingers together. That kind of amazement. Turns out he doesn't know how to operate the curtain rod either.
At this point my Mom comes in to see what the deal is, and because she, like me, and unlike my brother appreciates the immense humor in this situation, also starts laughing. Now she does know how to operate the curtain rod, however, she is laughing too hard to fix it either. She eventually manages to explain how to twist the rod so that it will stay and all that jazz and I can finally finish what was supposed to be an uneventful shower.
The thing is, these kinds of awkward/ridiculous things happen to me all the time. Why do these things happen to me? Do these things happen to everyone and they just never talk about them? Or am I actually the kind of person that sitcoms are based on?
13 comments:
Muse with me. Please?